My Best Breast Feeding Tips

Hi moms and moms-to-be! I see a lot of posts with questions on breast feeding and latching. I thought I would write a little post with some of my best tips. As you know, I breast fed Sophia for 2 years and have experienced many of the pitfalls. As soon as she was born they placed her on my chest and she latched on right away. At first the feeding went very well. But then my milk began to come in the day I was discharged. My breasts became two large hard boulders overnight! 

Engorgement: The engorgement from my milk coming in made them hot and hard. Every time I went to nurse Sophia the milk would squirt out like a fire hydrant and she would get milk all over her. I was leaking literally 24/7 and I thought it would never end. Because they were so full and hard it made latching so difficult. My nipples just seemed so large for her tiny mouth. In those early days the only way she would open wide enough was when she was crying. And thanks to the latching difficulty my nipples were getting so much abuse. 

Breastfeeding should NOT hurt and you should re-latch if it hurts after the first 20 seconds (before 20 seconds this is residual pain from damage done in a previous bad latch). I was re-latching several times every session. Also, expressing a little by hand before feeding (just to make the boob pliable) made latching a lot easier since I could compress my areola better than when they were hard and full of milk. Thankfully, as the books promised, the engorgement only lasted a max of 2-3 days and latching gradually got easier as my milk supply evened out.

Some Common Breast Feeding Positions. My favorite was the Sidelying.
Very easy on back and for sleeping while feeding!

  

Example of a good latch. Note: You don't need all of your
areola in baby's mouth if you have large areola's. Just get
enough areola in to force the nipple far back in baby's
mouth to prevent pain and nipple damage.

Latching: Try many different positions but always bring baby to your breast and not the other way around. You should never be hunched over baby. Instead use pillows to support your baby in the position. In order to latch well I used the "hamburger" method. Basically, squeeze your areola and nipple together and begin by inserting the bottom areola first, then the nipple, and finally the top areola. It takes lots of practice to get good at doing this quickly. Eventually you won't need to do this when baby gets big enough and learns how to latch on their own. It's easier for them when their mouths get bigger.  

Example of start of "hamburger" squeeze.

"Hamburger": Start with bottom areola.

Lansinoh Soothies Gel Pads

Helping Nipple Pain and Healing: Using vitamin e oil (I bought the gel pills and broke them open to use the oil inside) and Lansinoh’s Soothies Breast Gel Pads helped tremendously. I tried lanolin cream too,

Medela Breast Shells

but didn't like it as much. I also had plastic Breast Shell cups from Medela to put in my bra to keep the fabric off my sensitive nipples. I rubbed breast milk on my nipples after every feed and let them air dry for at least a few minutes. The breast milk trick is probably the best one of all of these. There are antibacterial properties in breast milk which aid the healing process and also lower your chances of getting an infection like thrush or mastitis. You should never wash your nipples with soap. Washing with water when you normally shower is all that is necessary. Washing your nipples after every feed is not recommended either as it can damage your nipples and wash away the natural substances excreted by the glands on the nipple which keep them clean and moist (this is why soap is especially bad).

Breast feeding and Uterine Contractions: You will experience uterine contractions while breast feeding for the first week or so, they will start out strong and get weaker with each feed as your uterus slowly shrinks back down to its original size. This is obviously ideal as it will help you return to your pre-pregnancy size sooner and also reduces postpartum bleeding. Some ibuprofen is a good way to ease the pain.

Supplementation: It is fine but not until after your milk supply is established. If you supplement before that time your body will not know how much milk to make for your baby and this can sabotage your breast feeding ability. This is because breast feeding is a supply and demand system. The more your baby demands, the more your body will produce.

Is My Baby Getting Enough?: It's hard for first time mom's to know if their baby is getting enough from the breast. Here are the main signs to look for; 4-6 wet diapers a day (starting from the 4th day of breast feeding), baby is nursing frequently (8-12+ times in 24 hours), hearing baby swallowing while nursing, baby is allowed to nurse as long as they want from one breast (this is especially important so the baby can get the rich fatty hind-milk - let baby nurse until they "pop" off on their own. This can be anywhere from 20-45 mins during a growth spurt), baby is gaining weight. 

The more you have baby at your breast the better for your supply.

Which Breast Do I Use? How do I alternate?: What worked for me was 1 breast per feeding (alternating each breast at each feed) unless my dd was going through a growth spurt and then I would offer the 2nd breast and start with that same breast at the next feeding. This allows maximum hind milk. Also, it is normal for one breast to produce more than another. For me, it was my left breast. This didn't change the way I fed my dd though. And yes, you might look slightly lopsided but it won't stay that way. ;)

Bottle Feeding: Starting bottle feeding too early can also interfere with breast feeding because it can make your baby a lazy nurser since breast feeding requires more work to get milk out than bottle feeding. Yes, there are bottles on the market that claim to work more like breast feeding. However, it's not true. There are no bottles like breast feeding. It's the special tongue movement on the nipple that can't be duplicated with a bottle. A good rule of thumb is not to introduce a bottle until after the 3 week mark. Of course, there are some babies that don't have a problem going between breast and bottle from day 1. But you never know what you will get so, in my opinion, it's better to wait the 3 weeks until breast feeding is established so you don't have any possibility of sabotaging your breast feeding ability.

  

Growth Spurts: Your baby will nurse even more frequently and for longer (and can be irritable) while going through a growth spurt. In my experience this can last anywhere from 3-7 days. It can make you feel like baby isn't getting enough when they suddenly want to nurse more but this is actually a good thing. It's natures way of increasing your milk supply to accommodate your growing baby. The typical growth spurts are 7-10 days, 2-3 weeks, 4-6 weeks, 3 months, 4 months, 6 months and 9 months (there are some after that but less frequent). The best thing you can do is nurse nurse nurse during a growth spurt!

Will It Get Easier? When?: I’d say breastfeeding for me significantly improved after 2 weeks and then became completely second nature around 2 months. 

A great resource for your breast feeding questions is Kellymom.com I cannot tell you how much I used that site when I first started breast feeding! It was a lifesaver. 

I really fell in love with breast feeding so I wanted to share my experience to help other moms be successful breast feeders too. 

So sorry I have not posted in so long!! So many things have happened in our lives since my last post. I started dating (which is VERY complicated as a single mom - a separate blogpost should follow on this topic alone) and became serious with a special someone with whom I connected so easily. Not so soon after we met (nearly 9 months later in fact), he met my amazing daughter and instantly fell in love with her too.

I cannot begin to tell you how much love and joy he brings to both of our lives. It is truly amazing to see the bond between all 3 of us grow and grow. We hope to make him a permanent addition to our lives some day. ;)

In other news, my little girl fully potty trained herself shortly after her second birthday (4 days after to be exact). Of course, you know we started with elimination communication when she was 3 months old. That

4 Month Old Diaper Free Baby

went well until I had to start working again when she was 6 months old. We were still doing it part time until she turned 1 year old. But once she turned 1, she became busy with all her new skills (walking, climbing, and studying everything)! So pottying was put on the back-burner. I would always keep her potty out and encourage her to sit. She would accompany me to the bathroom whenever I needed to go. And every now and again I would let her have some diaper free time.

4 Days Post 2nd Birthday

She started nursery school two days a week shortly before her second birthday. The socialization skills that have followed this experience have been wonderful! She was quickly moved to the 2 year old room where the children line up to go potty a few times a day. I believe seeing how her peers were using the potty was the most helpful in her decision to potty herself. Without any direction from me, she just sat down on her potty (with her toy laptop haha) after her bath and went pee. I was so shocked because she had not voluntarily gone to the potty in months! I praised her, of course, and she began doing it every day after that! It was really much easier and smoother than I had ever expected. If anyone would like a more detailed post about our pottying experience, please comment and let me know!

So proud of her first full potty chart!

Sophia trying to put on her big girl panties.

Night time pottying.

A Natural Introduction to Food: Baby Led Weaning

So I have been meaning to write this post for so long but the last year has just been crazy busy and I procrastinated. Better late than never though, right?

Sophia eating some casserole with the family (8 mo)

If you aren't familiar, Baby Led Weaning (BLW) is a way of introducing food to your child from the start of weaning (aka adding complimentary foods, not taking away the breast/formula) by allowing them to self feed and explore their food.

Unlike traditional weaning where baby is spoon fed purées, with BLW you offer baby a variety of foods in manageable shapes/sizes (think your finger size) for baby to feed themselves. BLW starts from 6 months on and takes advantage of your baby's natural desire to explore food and learn from it. To begin with baby won't eat a lot (more than what you think though) and it mostly looks like they are playing with food (but they are actually learning from it). They quickly advance their skills and, depending on the child, will begin to eat more efficiently within a few months. For us it was around the second month of BLW (8 month old).

You might be concerned that baby is not ingesting enough solid food. However, since breast milk or formula should be baby's PRIMARY nutrition for their first year this is not a valid concern. In fact, studies show that BLW babies learn to eat solid foods faster than spoon fed babies.

Sophia eating her favorite breakfast - eggs and sausage (16 mo)

BLW is messy to begin with but I would say Sophia became a pro around 14 months. Now, at almost 20 months old, she hardly ever makes a mess regardless of the kind of food she is eating. This is in stark contrast to my friend's son (also 20 months old), who was spoon fed, and creates a mountain of mess after every meal.

It's not to say spoon feeding is bad, but just that it is unnecessary. Purées were first recommended before doctors understood that breast milk and formula should be the primary nutrition for the first year and falsely believed babies needed supplementation from solids at 4 months old (before a baby has the drive or skill set to eat solid food - thus the need to purée the food).

Overall, our experience with BLW has been awesome! The most exciting part was watching her skills develop. I remember when she first developed the pincer grip when picking up a piece of cereal. I was so proud!

Sophia at the family table for Thanksgiving dinner 2012 (18 mo)

If you want to read more about BLW and try it, I highly recommend 'Baby-Led Weaning' by Gill Rapley and Tracey Murkett. It fully explains the skills that develop and also safeguards against choking. Also, it's important to understand gagging and how it is normal and healthy (and very different from choking). They describe how you should respond when your child gags in order to encourage and not scare them. They also talk about the many other benefits of BLW such as: developing healthy eating habits, trusting baby's instincts for nutrition, family meals, no mealtime battles, easier meal prep, and baby learning and developing from food.

Hope you enjoy BLW as much as we have!

Being an AP Mommy

Only recently did I read a book about attachment parenting. I read the Sears' 'The Attachment Parenting Book'. And as I read it I realized I've been an attachment parent since birth! It really did come naturally to me, the way the Sears describe it in the book.

In their book, the Sears describe AP as a means of opening your mind and heart to the individual needs of your child and letting your knowledge of your child be your guide to making decisions that are best for you and your child. They list several tools to help you and your child attach from birth. They call them the Baby B's: Birth Bonding, Breastfeeding, Baby Wearing, Bed Sharing, Belief in Baby's Cry, Balance and Boundaries, Beware of Baby Trainers.

Toddler Nursing (14 months old)

The biggest lesson I took away from this book was that I am the expert for my child. AP doesn't mean you need to do all the Baby B's all the time. You know what works best for you and your child. As an AP Mommy I trust my instincts and let those guide me as opposed to bending to what others tell me is best for my child. One case in point would be breastfeeding. Sophia and I have been breastfeeding for nearly 20 months now. Around 18 months she started having a sleep regression that caused her to wake 5+ times a night (like a newborn). I was at my wits end. I wanted to end night nursing because I needed sleep and people were convincing me that was the problem. It was difficult in my sleep deprived state not to believe them. My own mother (a bf advocate) was telling me to wean Sophia cold turkey to solve the problem. I contemplated what she was advising. However, it felt completely unnatural to me and was not how I saw our nursing relationship ending (especially when I was hoping to nurse until 24 months). I struggled through hoping against hope that it was a phase she would quickly out grow. I would say it took a few weeks of terrible sleep before I started to feel like we were getting back to normal. I am so pleased I stuck through the phase and listened to my instincts.

You can be an attachment parent and not use all of the tools. You can be an attachment parent and use CIO, bottle feed, say no, etc. AP is about knowing your child and making the best decisions for them based on that knowledge. It's about following your instincts. It's about creating a harmony between you and your child as you raise them. I believe balance and boundaries are the key as they grow older.

AP can be for any parent.... Single parents, working parents, married parents, stay at home parents... Whatever your situation, it is a very flexible parenting style.

Natural Birth Reading List

People often ask me what reading they can do to prep for a natural birth. I can't tell you what joy that question brings me. Not just because the suggestions I have are awesome (which they are) but because whoever is asking me this question has already shown the most important first step in prepping for a natural delivery... Research! Women who do their research on birth are far more likely to accomplish their goal. There are many reasons for this: avoiding unnecessary intervention, getting into a natural birth mindset, but most of all commitment to a natural birth (it really does take a strong will more than anything else).

So I had to post my reading list in the order I recommend you read them (in case you don't have time to read them all):

- 'Ina May's Guide to Childbirth' by Ina May Gaskin (Actually all of her books are AMAZING and worth the reading time!)

- 'Active Birth' by Janet Balaskas
- 'The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth' Henci Goer

- 'Your Best Birth' by Ricki Lake and Abby Epstein

- 'Birthing From Within' by Pam England and Rob Horowitz

I read many more but these were the ones I found to be the most useful and true to my experience. I hope they will help whoever else may stumble upon this page!!

Best quote I ever had for childbirth and breastfeeding came from my birth/bf educator. She said to me "Don't say you will TRY to have a natural childbirth or you will TRY to breastfeed. Say you WILL have a natural childbirth and you WILL breastfeed." She was completely accurate. It is all mind over matter. Say it, think it, believe it, and you WILL DO IT!!! 

Oh, and during childbirth it is important to surround yourself with people (doula, midwife, husband, mother, friend, ob, etc) who believe in you. If you have read my previous post about my childbirth experience you know my own mother was that support for me. It is so important because you will doubt yourself during birth (even if you don't mean it) so you need someone who will look you in the eyes and remind you of how strong you are and tell you that you are doing great. 

Love to all you looking for a natural childbirth! You are STRONG!!!! 

Rear Facing Your Precious Cargo

So I've been wanting to write this for awhile. Many new parents (myself included) are never taught car seat safety before their little one's arrival (and even after). In the early months of Sophia's life I did not know about car seat safety or the proper way to install a car seat or even to buckle her in safely. See the photos at the end of this post for examples of what NOT to do! I learned that I was doing it wrong through comments on Instagram on other mom's car seat photos. If it wasn't for these wonderful mother's teaching each other, I never would have learned what to do and what not to do. Praise God, we never had an accident in those early months when I was improperly using the car seat. Thanks to learning about car seat safety, I did further research and found out about the massive benefits of extended rear facing (and the risks of forward facing too early). Many people do not know or understand why rear facing is so important. I hope this post will help clear up some of the confusion while also giving some tips to avoid the major pitfalls of installing a car seat and buckling in your precious cargo.

My own mother did not understand the reasons for extended rear facing beyond a year and 20 lbs. No matter how many statistics I told her about how much safer it is to rear face (RF reduces injury by 96%; FF has a 40% risk of severe injuries). It wasn't until I found this video on YouTube that she finally changed her tune and is now pro RF beyond the minimum of 1 year and 20 lbs.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8gU9zzCGA8

This video was made by the grandfather of a child who was forward facing in an accident (at 18 months and 33 lbs). You can see now what an advocate he is of RF when he learned all the information he shares in this video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sssIsceKd6U

This video shows visually how the strain is put on the neck and spinal cord when children are FF in a frontal collision (96% of crashes are frontal and side impact).

The quote below from an article on cpsafety.com does a good job of explaining why it is safer to RF than FF for a small child:

"When a child is in a forward-facing seat, there is tremendous stress put on the child's neck, which must hold the large head back. The mass of the head of a small child is about 25% of the body mass whereas the mass of the adult head is only 6%!  A small child's neck sustains massive amounts of force in a crash.  The body is held back by the straps while the head is thrown forward - stressing, stretching or even breaking the spinal cord.  The child's head is at greater risk in a forward-facing seat as well.  In a crash, the head is thrown outside the confines of the seat and can make dangerous contact with other occupants, vehicle structures, and even intruding objects, like trees or other vehicles.

Rear-facing seats do a phenomenal job of protecting children because there is little or no force applied to the head, neck and spine.  When a child is in a rear-facing seat, the head, neck and spine are all kept fully aligned and the child is allowed to "ride down" the crash while the back of the child restraint absorbs the bulk of the crash force. The head is contained within the restraint, and the child is much less likely to come into contact with anything that might cause head injury."

Here are some more tips for safe riding:

• Be sure to read your car seat manual and your car manual to learn proper installation of your car seat.

• 

  Safe Riding Sophie!

  When buckling in your child make sure the chest clip is at arm pit level. Also check to make sure there is not too much seat belt slack (you shouldn't be able to pinch it together). And make sure the safety belts lie flat and are not twisted.
• The harness straps should be at or below your child's shoulders for RF. For FF they should be at or above their shoulders.
• Do not put bulky clothes on your child (i.e. snow suits and thick coats). Instead put a blanket over them once they are buckled in their seat for warmth. Reason being in the event of a crash the coats/snowsuits would get compressed and the child will not be as protected and could even slip out of the car seat belts completely.
• When properly installed your car seat should not move more than an inch in any direction.
• The middle of the back seat is the safest place for your
  child. If you have two children put the youngest in the middle and the older one on the passenger side of the back seat.
• If you are using an infant carrier seat make sure the handle is in the down position (most but not all car seat's have this rule - check your car seat manual).

I hope these video's and tips help other parent's. Ride safe everyone!!

This was probably my worst car seat offending moment.

There was a time I did not know car seat safety.

Update on EC

Well...Sophia is almost 9 months old! Sorry I have not posted in so long.... I've been working like a crazy woman!

I just wanted to update everyone on our experience with EC since so many mommies have been asking me about it. So far I have no complaints! We are still doing it part time and Sophia is doing so well with it. She actually holds in her poop until I get a chance to put her on her potty. Now that we have started solids (another post to follow on that experience) her poop is more solid too. And she only poops once every other day.

I am still following her cues to give her opoportunities to go on the potty. She definitely whines now to be put on the potty when she has to poo. She absolutely refuses to poo in her diaper. I also put her on the potty after she eats, has a diaper change, and when she wakes up since it is convenient and she usually has to pee around these times.

Pretty much every time I put her on the potty she goes. In traditional potty training some parents feel the need to praise the child for going to the bathroom or give treats. With EC it is recommended that you do not praise or treat for going on the potty. I think this has worked very well for us as Sophia understands that going to the potty is just something that everyone does and doesn't expect any reward other than the internal relief she feels after going on the potty.

If you are thinking of trying EC go for it! My guess is you won't be disappointed. If you are wondering which potty to get... I think you can tell from my photos we are big fans of the Baby Bjorn Potty! But get whichever one you like best. It is good to keep it simple though and try to avoid those potties with a lot of music and gadgets as they are counterproductive to the purpose of EC. Let me know if you have any questions you would like me to address in my future posts. Happy EC'ing!!