Being an AP Mommy

Only recently did I read a book about attachment parenting. I read the Sears' 'The Attachment Parenting Book'. And as I read it I realized I've been an attachment parent since birth! It really did come naturally to me, the way the Sears describe it in the book.

In their book, the Sears describe AP as a means of opening your mind and heart to the individual needs of your child and letting your knowledge of your child be your guide to making decisions that are best for you and your child. They list several tools to help you and your child attach from birth. They call them the Baby B's: Birth Bonding, Breastfeeding, Baby Wearing, Bed Sharing, Belief in Baby's Cry, Balance and Boundaries, Beware of Baby Trainers.

Toddler Nursing (14 months old)

The biggest lesson I took away from this book was that I am the expert for my child. AP doesn't mean you need to do all the Baby B's all the time. You know what works best for you and your child. As an AP Mommy I trust my instincts and let those guide me as opposed to bending to what others tell me is best for my child. One case in point would be breastfeeding. Sophia and I have been breastfeeding for nearly 20 months now. Around 18 months she started having a sleep regression that caused her to wake 5+ times a night (like a newborn). I was at my wits end. I wanted to end night nursing because I needed sleep and people were convincing me that was the problem. It was difficult in my sleep deprived state not to believe them. My own mother (a bf advocate) was telling me to wean Sophia cold turkey to solve the problem. I contemplated what she was advising. However, it felt completely unnatural to me and was not how I saw our nursing relationship ending (especially when I was hoping to nurse until 24 months). I struggled through hoping against hope that it was a phase she would quickly out grow. I would say it took a few weeks of terrible sleep before I started to feel like we were getting back to normal. I am so pleased I stuck through the phase and listened to my instincts.

You can be an attachment parent and not use all of the tools. You can be an attachment parent and use CIO, bottle feed, say no, etc. AP is about knowing your child and making the best decisions for them based on that knowledge. It's about following your instincts. It's about creating a harmony between you and your child as you raise them. I believe balance and boundaries are the key as they grow older.

AP can be for any parent.... Single parents, working parents, married parents, stay at home parents... Whatever your situation, it is a very flexible parenting style.